I have always been against those goody bags new parents pass out on planes when they fly with their baby for the first time. Traveling with littles in tow is very stressful and involves a lot of planning ahead so the last thing new parents have time for is to make goody bags for other passengers. Besides, I have sat next to my fair share of rude and obnoxious passengers and none of them were apologetic or offered me anything. I literally once sat next to a woman who pooped her pants and the flight attendants had to keep walking up and down the aisle spritzing perfume! (I know it is hard to believe, but that actually happened!) Anyways, my point is, this is one time I have not been on board with goody bags (and I love goody bags!).
We now have many flights with Hudson under our belts, including one where he screamed the entire time we were waiting to board, and the people behind me very loudly exclaimed it would probably be their bad fortune to end up next to me. Well, Hudson did not make a peep the entire flight and when I smugly stood up at the end of my flight and waited for my round of applause, or pat on the back, or apology, or heck, even a smile, I got nothing. So I felt happy that I didn’t waste my time making treats for all those random travelers.
Then Luc came along. Luc is the worst traveler! He hates the car, he hates to sleep and he absolutely hates flying too. After a two hour flight to Mexico, I was covered in coffee, sweat and on the verge of tears. I had to hold Luc’s legs the entire flight, while simultaneously trying to shove snacks down his throat to keep him from screaming and provide entertainment every 3 minutes because that was about how long each activity held his attention. I apologized to the man in front of me every time Luc kicked his seat (which was around 5 times) and apologized again at the end of the flight (I am an over-apologizer by nature) to which he loudly announced to everyone around us that my kid had kicked him the entire flight. I was mortified!
On our recent trip to Maui, Luc was a whiney, over-tired, loud, mess and the thing is, when a newborn baby cries people seem to be fairly understanding. They expect it from a baby. My two year old, who is gigantic and probably looks more like a three year old, is expected to behave. People have no sympathy or understanding when toddlers mis-behave on a plane and I can assure you they definitely don’t think it is cute.
So, with our upcoming Australia trip looming over me, I decided that I was going to have to give in to my people-pleasing ways and attempt to bribe the people around me into not totally hating us. 15 hours is just way too long to have daggers coming my way from all directions. Of course, when I searched Pinterest all the cards were all sweet and apologetic and geared for sweet little babies who might just cry. No one made one for the obnoxious, dictator toddler who kicks, screams and manipulates their parent the entire flight, while simultaneously torturing everyone around them. So, I went ahead and made my own. Here’s to hoping the benadryl our pediatrician recommended works and the people sitting around us have a sense of humor. 😉
Click here to get these labels. 🙂 Happy Flying!